Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he
would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business
flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he
wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM " He left it where he
knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover
it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the
bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up." Men are not equipped for
these kinds of contests.
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An
earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to
concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the wife
replied , "in-laws".
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,pour it onto your
upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.
W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a
day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, "The reason has to be
because we have to repeat everything to men... The husband then turned to
his wife and asked, "What?"
CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and
so beautiful all at the same time."
The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.God made me beautiful so you would
be attracted to me;God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!"
WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee
each morning.The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first,and
then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you should
do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that
the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the
top of several pages, that it indeed says.........."HEBREWS"
