Author Topic: Are You An Internet Addict?  (Read 1034 times)

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Offline Valks

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Are You An Internet Addict?
« on: February 09, 2006, 01:52:02 AM »
You Know it's time to turn your computer off n read a book when .......

1. When your mother phones and you have to ask her to spell her surname.
2. You forgot how to work the TV remote control.
3. You see something funny and scream, "LOL, LOL."
4. You meet the postman at the door and swear he said YOU'VE GOT MAIL.
5. You sign off and your screen says you were on for 3 days and 45 minutes.
6. You fall asleep, but instead of dreams you get IMs.
7. You buy a laptop and a cell phone so you can have “Chat” in your car.
8. Tech support calls YOU for help.
9. You beg your friends to get an account so you can "hang out."
10. You get a second phone line just to call out for pizza.
11. You purchase a vanity car license plate with your screen name on it.
12. You say "he he he he" or "heh heh heh" instead of laughing.
13. You say "SCROLL UP" when someone asks what it was you just said.
14. You sneak away to your computer when everyone goes to sleep.
15. You talk on the phone with the same person you are sending an instant message to.
16. You look at an annoying person off line and wish that you had your ignore button handy.
17. You start to experience "withdrawal" while making a coffee.
18. "Where did the time go??"
19. You sit on “Chat” for 6 hours for that certain special person to sign on.
20. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.
21. .....You end your sentences with.....three or more stops.......
22. You've gone to an unstaffed “Chat” room to give tech support.
23. You think faster than the computer.
24. You enter a room and get greeted by 25 people with {{{hugs}}} and **kisses**.
25. Being called a "newbie" or “anorak” is a major insult to you.
26. You're on the phone and say BRB.
27. Your boss recommends a drug test for the blood shot eyes.
28. Your answering machine/voice mail sounds a little like this...."BRB. Leave your S/N and I^ll TTYL ASAP".
29. You need to be pried from your computer by the Jaws-of-life.
 

WAYS TO IDENTIFY IF YOU ARE A NET NERD

* Your lover has a .COM after their name.
* When you consider cracking your knuckles as morning exercise.
* When Yahoo does not mean a hick.
* Given the choice, you would fix your broken computer before your broken leg.
* Your significant other is a computer.
* When a server crash is more important than a stock crash.
* When your computer has more cookies than you.
* When 4netnerds.com is on your bookmark list.
* You are more upset with a busy signal from your ISP than a busy signal from your mother.
* When you wake up in the morning you have to log on before you can decide how you are doing.
 

The 12-Step Program for W.A.S.(Web Addict Survivors) Join now ... no dues!

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I use to, before the Web.
2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.
3) I will get dressed before noon.
4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web.
5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived.
6) I will call someone on the phone whom I cannot contact via the Web.
7) I will read a book...if I still remember how.
8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web.
9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.
10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.
11) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed some time ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow!
 

Valks